Most of the time, I'm pretty surprised about the things that don't bother me about parenting. For instance, I thought I'd be really annoyed by whininess and clinginess, and surprisingly it doesn't annoy me all that much. I was a little worried about how I'd handle the ick factor - between diapers, vomit and adventures in feeding, everyone knows babies can be disgusting. But turns out, I have a really high tolerance for bodily effluvia and general disgusting mess. Tantrums don't really faze me, and moving at baby pace (ready to go! Ok, wait - where are your shoes, did you take them off? Where did you put them? Ah, I see, you hid them in your wagon. Here we go, back on....what's that smell? Ok, let's change the stinky pants and then we'll go! Ready? Let's see, diaper bag, check...well, we'll probably be gone long enough I should bring a snack. Just one minute, let me get a snack to put in your bag. All right, here we go! wait, where are your shoes?.....) is ok with me as well.
But there are a few things, I have to say, I really dislike about parenting. Overall, they're few in relation to the great parts, but still. The end of sleeping in, for example, no amount of cuteness makes that better. On Saturday mornings, when I take Owen to the playground at QUARTER TO SEVEN in the morning, I exchange sympathetic glances with the other dejected looking women with one eye on their toddlers and the other staring glumly into a giant coffee. your kid was tearing your house apart at 5:15 too, huh? I feel you sister.
Then there's the paying for babysitters. Not while I'm at work, that I can get behind. For some reason paying someone to watch Owen while we're working seems entirely reasonable and does not bother me, but paying someone to watch him so we can go out to dinner really bothers me. I'm not sure quite why this is such a sticking point with me, but most of the time I choose NOT to go out because I have having to pay a babysitter that much, even when we want to go somewhere and can afford the sitter. I suspect this has less to do with some essential elements of parenting and much more to do with my incureable tightwaddery.
And really, that was it, until this week. And then I discovered the doozy, the first thing I really, REALLY don't like about parenting.
First Andy was sick, then Owen was sick, and now I'm sick. Andy has recovered nicely, but Owen's and my sick has overlapped, which has never happened before and I've suddenly realized reeeeeallly sucks. A sick baby is terrible, but a sick baby plus a sick mom is REALLY terrible. Especially when baby has decided that he can only be comforted by mom. When your throat is sore and your sinuses are blocked and you have a headache that you think will probably kill you before it gets better, a sobbing, feverish baby at 2am is pretty much the worst thing ever. And turns out, you can't explain that you're not feeling well. Babies, they just don't understand. It's been two days now, and although Newton Wellesley Pediatrics assures me it's just a virus (not the swine flu, call me paranoid but I did check) I'm starting to wonder if we'll both survive.
If this blog never gets updated again, you'll know that not-swine-flu got the best of us.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Sunday, May 3, 2009
like a fat kid love cake
One of the joys of parenting is getting to celebrate "first" milestones. Owen was feeling a little under the weather this weekend, and yesterday the weather was GORGEOUS, so we decided to take a nice walk to the ice cream store to get us out of the house and get Owen his first ice cream cone as a way of cheering him up a little.
Turns out Owen loves ice cream. really LOVES ice cream.
Here is Owen being presented with his cone. So serious. Owen approached the demolition of this cone with the concentration of a competitive eater:
After this photo, I decided that he'd had enough ice cream. First of all, they gave a one year old two enormous scoops. That's more than enough ice cream for an adult, despite the "kiddie" size claim. So I tried to take it away. This made Owen extremely upset. In the first photo you can see the anger and in the second, suspicion that I might get near him and try again.
Finally, he was making such an enormous mess with the ice cream melting all over him and the stroller, that I said I'd take the plunge and took the cone away, resulting in a total meltdown. Somehow, Andy got too close to the flailing ball of misery that our son had become and Owen swiftly liberated what was left of Andy's cone. Which we figured, he was entitled to having defeated us fair and square. So he happily finished eating that one all the way home.
Turns out Owen loves ice cream. really LOVES ice cream.
Here is Owen being presented with his cone. So serious. Owen approached the demolition of this cone with the concentration of a competitive eater:
After this photo, I decided that he'd had enough ice cream. First of all, they gave a one year old two enormous scoops. That's more than enough ice cream for an adult, despite the "kiddie" size claim. So I tried to take it away. This made Owen extremely upset. In the first photo you can see the anger and in the second, suspicion that I might get near him and try again.
Finally, he was making such an enormous mess with the ice cream melting all over him and the stroller, that I said I'd take the plunge and took the cone away, resulting in a total meltdown. Somehow, Andy got too close to the flailing ball of misery that our son had become and Owen swiftly liberated what was left of Andy's cone. Which we figured, he was entitled to having defeated us fair and square. So he happily finished eating that one all the way home.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Big Adventures & Beautiful Weather
Owen's been having a great time since the weather improved! Some shots of his first visit to the Franklin Park Zoo as well as some we took in the Arboretum yesterday. I try and try to get good shots where he's looking happy/cute, but this kid is just so ON THE MOVE all the time that it's practically impossible. It's the best I can do to even catch him in the frame! I have some funny video of him running around the arboretum, throwing his hat on the ground over and over and yelling "Uh Oh!" (again, we're still working on the distinction between "uh oh" and deliberate mischief) But I'm apparently not smart enough to figure out how to make it post and play, so you'll have to settle for pictures until Andy gets around to posting them up.
Monday, April 20, 2009
what babies need.
I have a couple friends who are pregnant right now, who are freaking out because the economy is so bad, and a couple friends who are deliberately NOT pregnant right now when they otherwise would be, because the economy is so bad.
And to all I say, chill out. Yes, the economy is really bad. But, the truth is, you've been led to beleive that babies are really expensive and they need a lot of stuff. I, too, thought that. Before I had one. And then I realized that babies only need about 5 things.
1) enough clothes to make it through 3(ish) days (depending on how often you care to do laundry)
2) diapers (I'm not going to harrangue you about cloth again, but disposeables are bad for the environment and a waste of money, for the record)
3) Something to eat in that he/she can be buckled into (The tripp trapp is the gold standard, but if you can't afford that, go for the keekaroo right height chair)
4) an Ergo carrier
5) a car seat
I can't think of a single other thing not on this list that if I didn't have over the last year, I would have missed. Don't get me wrong - I have a lot of baby crap - but I hardly ever used ANY of it. All the things I thought I NEEDED - nope. Just taking up room in my house. Crib? Ha. As if the baby sleeps in a crib. That baby's been in bed with me since day one. Swing? Used it about twice. Stroller? The last time we used our Graco stroller was Thanksgiving Day, and I've probably used it a dozen times total since Owen was born (I'm not talking about the specialized bike trailer/jog stroller - we do use that, when I want to go for a run or we want to take a bike ride together, but it's certainly not nescessary. That is a definite babygear luxury). Boppy? Never used it. bouncy seat? jumperoo? used each a few times, maybe. baby tub? The baby can take a shower while you do, and will love it. Toys? Owen has to date shown absolutely no interest in any of the toys lavished on him by well meaning grandparents and friends - but he's facinated by tupperware, pots, cardboard boxes, suitcases, and every other mundane household object that you could think of.
The one thing that you cannot live without is an Ergo carrier (or a Beco, or a Calyx, or any other soft shaped carrier). They are expensive, it's true - about $120 new (although we got ours used for $50.) It's pretty much the only baby gear item (besides a carseat, which is legislated) that we use every day and couldn't exist without. Owen spends a great deal of his life in the Ergo, and loves every minute of it. And ever since he turned 6 months or so, I've realized that he does actually need a high chair. (we originally had the chicco polly and ended up giving it away because it was so obnoxious - go for less bells and whistles instead of more, every time)
will we have to buy things as he gets older? certainly. Does daycare cost a lot? yep, it does - but if you can survive on one income, then it won't. your mileage will vary on that one. But I can honestly say that if we didn't have one single baby item besides the five on that list, our lives would be not a smidge different than they are right now, and Owen is a pretty happy guy. And the economy will either get better or it won't, but either way a baby isn't going to put you on the road to financial armogeddeon. At least, not for the first year. By sixth grade, when there's soccer fees and summer camp and violin lessons and every other stupid thing, then maybe. And by college, definitely. But in the near term, for the next two years?
breastfeed. wear your baby. cloth diaper. your baby won't cost you much at all.
And to all I say, chill out. Yes, the economy is really bad. But, the truth is, you've been led to beleive that babies are really expensive and they need a lot of stuff. I, too, thought that. Before I had one. And then I realized that babies only need about 5 things.
1) enough clothes to make it through 3(ish) days (depending on how often you care to do laundry)
2) diapers (I'm not going to harrangue you about cloth again, but disposeables are bad for the environment and a waste of money, for the record)
3) Something to eat in that he/she can be buckled into (The tripp trapp is the gold standard, but if you can't afford that, go for the keekaroo right height chair)
4) an Ergo carrier
5) a car seat
I can't think of a single other thing not on this list that if I didn't have over the last year, I would have missed. Don't get me wrong - I have a lot of baby crap - but I hardly ever used ANY of it. All the things I thought I NEEDED - nope. Just taking up room in my house. Crib? Ha. As if the baby sleeps in a crib. That baby's been in bed with me since day one. Swing? Used it about twice. Stroller? The last time we used our Graco stroller was Thanksgiving Day, and I've probably used it a dozen times total since Owen was born (I'm not talking about the specialized bike trailer/jog stroller - we do use that, when I want to go for a run or we want to take a bike ride together, but it's certainly not nescessary. That is a definite babygear luxury). Boppy? Never used it. bouncy seat? jumperoo? used each a few times, maybe. baby tub? The baby can take a shower while you do, and will love it. Toys? Owen has to date shown absolutely no interest in any of the toys lavished on him by well meaning grandparents and friends - but he's facinated by tupperware, pots, cardboard boxes, suitcases, and every other mundane household object that you could think of.
The one thing that you cannot live without is an Ergo carrier (or a Beco, or a Calyx, or any other soft shaped carrier). They are expensive, it's true - about $120 new (although we got ours used for $50.) It's pretty much the only baby gear item (besides a carseat, which is legislated) that we use every day and couldn't exist without. Owen spends a great deal of his life in the Ergo, and loves every minute of it. And ever since he turned 6 months or so, I've realized that he does actually need a high chair. (we originally had the chicco polly and ended up giving it away because it was so obnoxious - go for less bells and whistles instead of more, every time)
will we have to buy things as he gets older? certainly. Does daycare cost a lot? yep, it does - but if you can survive on one income, then it won't. your mileage will vary on that one. But I can honestly say that if we didn't have one single baby item besides the five on that list, our lives would be not a smidge different than they are right now, and Owen is a pretty happy guy. And the economy will either get better or it won't, but either way a baby isn't going to put you on the road to financial armogeddeon. At least, not for the first year. By sixth grade, when there's soccer fees and summer camp and violin lessons and every other stupid thing, then maybe. And by college, definitely. But in the near term, for the next two years?
breastfeed. wear your baby. cloth diaper. your baby won't cost you much at all.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
In Retrospect,
Cheering wildly and praising him for genius every time Owen messed up something/dropped something/broke something/knocked food off his tray and then appropriately said "Uh Oh!" might not have been the greatest idea Andy and I ever had.
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