Tae Kwon Do. Why not?

I don't know who put karate into Owen's head, but it's been lodged there for about 6 months and so I finally agreed to go find Owen a class. The nearest one to us is in Great Barrington, which I initially groaned about but after having done the drive a few times now, I'm over - it's really not THAT bad. Around here we exaggerate how far GB is away from us for effect, but it's really only 25 minutes. In the city, you would spend that trying to get your kid to an activity in Newton, especially if you needed to get there around 5pm.

I was initially quite resistant to getting Owen into martial arts. I'm not sure what my objections were, exactly...they still seem kind of vague and more or less boiled down to "don't you want to do soccer like all the other kids?" I didn't feel like teaching my kids to be aggressive and/or effective fighters was really a good idea. I tried hard to steer him toward a tumbling and movement class in Canaan - but he reeeeally wanted karate. I actually couldn't find a karate studio anywhere near us, but Owen accepted Tae Kwon Do as a fair substitute after observing a class. Unfortunately, he continues to insist on calling it Karate, much to the owner of the studio's chagrin. Apparently, Tae Kwon Do and Karate are NOT the same thing. Don't mess it up. Owen has learned to (begrudgingly) call it "kowndo" in the presence of Master Brown, but at home, he's quite clear that he's learning Karate. Whatever.

Anyway, now that we're a few weeks in, my ambivalence about tae kwon do has largely evaporated. First of all, there's the cute factor:

The cuteness! It kills me. but I suspect you could dress up my kids in just about any outfit/sporting costume and I'd think they're adorable. What I really like about it, and what has surprised me, is the high expectations they have of a kid Owen's size, without being draconian or punitive or otherwise age-inappropriate. What's interesting about this studio is that - unlike what I had imagined - he does NOT take class with a bunch of other similarly adorable 4 year olds. At this studio (and I'm not sure if this is because of the philosophy of tae kwon do and they do this everywhere, or the rural area we live in - there probably aren't enough people here to have classes separated by age) everyone takes class together. EVERYONE. Here was the class yesterday:

yep. That's 5 black belts, (you can't see two of them) and advanced red belt (she's not wearing her belt for some reason) a purple belt, two yellow belts (there's one behind one of the kids in front you can't see - actually, it's the son of the yellow belt adult you CAN see, sitting next to Owen. It's a dad and his 12ish year old son doing it together and I think they're awesome. They're clearly using this as a way to "bond" - and it's working) and Owen. So you, like I, might think that they are amused by Owen, think he's cute, and largely ignore him while the rest of them actually learn martial arts and work on their skills. You'd be wrong. Every last one of the advanced belts and the instructor (Mr. Brown) take Owen as seriously as a member of the class as the black belts that are flipping and chopping and doing their tricks. If Owen is fooling around and not paying attention, everyone stands stock still while they wait for him to get it together. They expect him to participate, follow along, do what he can do, wait patiently while they're not specifically teaching him something or doing something he can do, and just generally treat him like every other member of the class. I have to say, I'm impressed. I thought after the first class he would find it boring, and be unable to live up to the expectations, but I was wrong. He's doing really well, and asks to go every day. The older kids who have achieved higher belts are remarkably polite, self posessed, and extremely patient, thoughtful and helpful in instructing the lower belts. Everything in the class is based on the level you've achieved, not age, so there might be a 13 year old green belt helping an adult orange belt, or a 19 year old black belt spending an entire class teaching a 4 year old white belt a single kick. Observing this, I was thinking to myself - is that 16 year old advanced belt going to be angry when they realize the class is over and they've spent the entire thing showing someone who has just started the same thing over and over? Don't they want to be practicing their advanced tricks? Then I started reading through the studio materials and realized that in fact, the point of being an advanced belt is participating in the leadership program and helping the less advanced belts learn. That was enough for me to buy into it, especially if Owen really wants to do it. We just need to work on him yelling "Ki-ya!" instead of "Hi-ya!" Apparently, "Hi-ya" is Karate. And Tae Kwon do and Karate are NOT the same thing.

First day of school

me: Owen! How was your very first day of pre-k?

Owen: great! The teacher said at the beginning NO WEAPONS. Weapons are like guns, swords, light sabers and stuff like that. So me, Oliver and Finn played guns on the playground and we didn't get caught! And I shot Oliver 10 times.



Ah. Great. You, Oliver and Finn are going to be quite the little prison gang someday.

We went on vacation and I didn't take any pictures.

Let's just get that out of the way right there in the title - I didn't take any pictures. I know, I know. It's much less interesting to read text on a blog than it is to look at cute pictures, but it is what it is. I am simply a lousy photojournalist, and what's more, I found it insanely frustrating as a kid when my mom would follow us around like a maniac with a camera insisting we reproduce certain activities, pose in front of various landmarks, and just generally pretend to have fun for the sake of taking a picture instead of actually having fun. So for the sake of posterity, I'll have to verbally recap our vacation and the last bit of the summer.

We went to the same place we went last year, and oh what a difference a year makes. In fact, this year's vacation was vastly superior to last year's vacation for two reasons. First and foremost, both kids are a year older. A year older, a year less irrational, a year more compliant, and a year less likely to plunge themselves to an untimely death at any moment. (Also! Both potty trained. We cannot overlook that.) Second, we learned that the secret to a successful vacation is going with another family. Kids have playmates that are NOT their siblings, and thus much less likely to instigate all-out brawls, parents have company AND can crib a little date-night time as a couple by switching off nights leaving one couple home with all the kids. In addition, while the ratio is the same when you have two parents and two kids as when you have four parents and four kids, somehow it seems much, much easier with four adults. For instance, in the morning: one adult can make breakfast and pack lunches, one adult can pack beach bags and organize the stuff for the day and straighten up the condo, two adults can do all the sunscreening and coralling of wiggly kids. It's great.

Newport was again, a great place to spend a vacation. The biggest highlight was the beach, as last year. I've concluded after this summer that there is literally no amount of time my children can spend at a beach (ocean or lake)after which they are sick of it. They can and do spend all day at a beach and still protest when it's time to go. We spent two full days at the beach, dragging all the children off only for lunch, during which they just demanded to go back to the beach. Easton's beach is great for kids, with the carousel, waterslide, playground and clean restrooms, but there is a significant red tide problem there that put a little bit of a damper on our second day at the beach. The kids also loved touring Fort Adams - I wasn't sure how a tour of a historic site would go over with a gaggle of four and unders, but surprisingly they were captivated. Owen became extremely into the idea of "listening tunnels" as a strategy to defeat his enemies (enemies TBD, naturally. He's just filing ideas away for later, I guess.)

We went back on the Amazing Grace Harbor tour. You might remember that we did this last year; if you do remember you're probably surprised to hear that we did it again. It was a pretty traumatic experience last year. Both children were waaaaay too young to be on a boat and it was all we could do to keep them from man-overboard. They ran around the boat, resisting arrest, refusing to wear life jackets, and just generally trying to drown. This year, they were both cooperative and loved it. Like I said before, what a difference a year makes. The other highlight of the week was the Newport Gulls baseball game. The boys LOVED it. The stadium is tiny (truly tiny) and it's not even a minor league team, it's a college wooden bat league. The staff was so friendly (the bat boys came out to the bleachers giving kids balls from the game, the announcer would announce whatever you wanted him to - he wished the birthday boy in our party a happy second birthday - and the whole night out was so cheap! Including tickets for our family, parking, and a bag of popcorn at the stadium, we spent $17. By contrast, we spent $28 that morning to play mini-golf - and the mini-golf place didn't even charge us for Elias! (BTW, if you find yourself in RI - there has to be a better mini-golf place than Mulligan's Island. We weren't impressed). We enjoyed taking the boys out for lunch, which we didn't even attempt last year. All in all, a good time was had by all.

Now summer is winding down, and Owen is so, so excited to be starting at the "big school" (the public elementary school across the road from us) in pre-k this fall. I have mixed feelings about it. After our week away, we went back and spent a weekend at our friend's houses in West Roxbury in our old neighborhood. It's true, summer here in Lakeville is great, but as the fall approaches, I'd much rather be back in Westie, with all the kids' old friends, our friends, and the city than here. I'm just a city person, honestly. For what it's worth, the kids have made new friends and if you asked them, I'm pretty sure they'd rather be here. And I do think that I'd rather live here than in a suburb of Boston - I'll take Lakeville over Needham or Natick any day. But it did make me a little West Roxbury-sick this weekend, I have to admit it. Maybe it's just because it was where our first real home was, but I miss it and suspect I'll always be comparing where we live to there. I do realize there are real advantages to where we are, however (great public schools being chief among them), so c'est la vie. And la vie rolls on into the fall.......

Summer

In today's news, summer continues to be great here in Lakeville.

Today, the town had a 4th of July celebration at the Grove (complete with guy in colonial garb showing up to read the declaration of independence and the town band - average age 75 if it's a day - playing a patriotic medley that was actually pretty peppy) and it was great. There were games for kids - old school potato sack and relay races, a parachute, and water balloon toss - and of course, the lake for swimming. Almost all of the kids' school friends and their families were there. We ended up having an impromptu potluck lunch/party with several other Housatonic Child Care Center families who are also associated with Hotchkiss. A good time was had by all. True story: I said to one of the other women there "I thought Lakeville was just AWFUL all year, until memorial day. Now I think it's totally great! It's such a great place to spend the summer!" She replied "well, that IS why most people don't live here year round." Ba dum, ching. Right. Of course.

Anyway, The past few weeks have hatched a different Cox family long-game. Sure, we still want to move back to civilization in a few years. But we want to try and do so in a way that lets us keep the house. If that means renting instead of buying for our next move, it might be worth it if we don't have to sell what we hope will someday just be our vacation house. I'd like to spend quite a few more summers at the grove.

Some photos from the day:

and this one, just because it's funny. It's an action shot of Owen throwing a water balloon - it's just the way the photo came out but this kid looks like he as a killer gym-chiseled physique in this shot, does he not? when I first saw it I thought "who is that teenager wearing Owen's star wars swim trunks?" (Immediately after, I thought "why the heck didn't I notice he was wearing his socks? Did he swim in those?"

After School Pickup, Before Dinner:

Have I mentioned how great it is to live down the street from the beach?

Curb Appeal

Andy had a commitment this afternoon but I really was getting tired of looking at our sorry window boxes:

So, despite my misgivings in trying to do any sort of project while in sole charge of the kids, I decided we were going to go for it. Surprisingly, despite the loss of about a cubic foot of potting soil (some was spilled while "helping me", some was deliberately dumped instead of helping me, and at least a handful was eaten by Elias) we managed to get it done. we cleared out the dead plants and old soil, and refilled them with shade loving flowers - mostly varieties of impatients and begonias, and a couple blue flowering vines that supposedly like shade. I ended up with 5 extra 6-packs of impatients, so I planted them around the stairs.


and after:

whole front of the house:

It really does make a huge difference from the street, but looking at these pictures it's not really appearing as a dramatic effect. The pictures aren't really capturing the extent of the improvement, but oh well. It really does look much better now.

In the back of the house, we have the truly awesome Hen Palace, built entirely by Andy and I have to say I am impressed. It's really nice.

Here are some interior shots of where the hens roost at night, for safety. you can also see the nest boxes he built with a separate hinged roof, to make egg collection easier:

The thing is a veritable 5-star hen hotel. It has indoor and outdoor areas. shaded and sunny areas. some grassy area, some dirt for pecking and scratching....and yet. One thing we didn't anticipate is that we would end up with the 5 dumbest hens on the planet. In all the chicken books I read, it just explained what sort of living environment was ideal for hens - some indoor area, some outdoor area, secure from predators, etc. It provided plans for building a luxury chicken coop just like the one we built. But our stupid chickens can't figure out how to get in and out of the coop (where, according to the book, it is their instinct to go in at night and roost, and come out during the day and forage, peck, wander around, whatever.) When the coop was completed, we put them in to the run, where they pecked around. as night started to fall, they showed no interest into going into the coop to roost. So we had to actually enter the coop ourselves, catch them, and put them in for the night. In the morning, we opened the door. surely, they would walk down the ramp into their fenced area to forage around and do what hens do. Nope. By noon, they were still all in the coop. I started to worry about them starving, so I moved their food and water (which is supposed to be out in their run) into the coop and tried to shoo them down the ramp. no such luck. they're STILL in there now, and it's 5pm. The door is open, they just can't or don't want to walk through it. dummies.

......I'd Be Rich

If I had a nickel for every conversation I had, exactly like this one:

Person: "So, how are you guys settling into Lakeville?"
Me: (politely, if unenthusiastically) "Well, thanks."
Person: "you guys are right in town, right? Do you LOVE it?!"
Me: "We're settling in. Getting the house in order. Starting to come together."
Person: (visibly consternated that I am not singing loudly the praises of the eden that is Lakeville) "wait, you guys haven't been here for a summer yet, right? you came in the fall."
Me: "right. well, technically we got out here mid august last year, but we were in a rental far from campus while we sold our house and got our bearings and figured out where we wanted to live. We didn't move to Lakeville until November."
Person: "Ahhhh. that explains it. Just wait till the grove opens and you're here for a summer. You'll love it. Especially where you are."
Me: (inwardly rolling eyes, outwardly polite.) "So I've heard. Can't wait! thanks!"

....I'd be rich.


Everyone told us to buy a house in Lakeville. Despite this, we started our house search in Great Barrington and Egremont, MA. I was dead set on living over the MA border. Our realtor gamely showed us houses, but kept hinting that if we were working in the Lakeville/Sharon area, we really should consider looking at properties in CT, because we'd really hate the winter commute and she was sure we were just going to want to be in Lakeville in the summer anyways. It's so great! So we looked at places in Lakeville and Sharon. We saw a huge house in Sharon that I was in love with, 2 miles from the hospital I work at, 5 bedrooms, being sold by an elderly couple who needed to go into nursing care and so priced lower than it was worth. We almost moved on it, but we kept getting nudged by well meaning locals in our house search back into Lakeville, to a house near the lake. We ended up in this little house in the middle of town 1/2 mile from the town beach, which everyone calls "the grove". It was really small, and didn't have a huge yard, which we assumed we would get since we were moving to the country. It was a little oddly laid out. The space definitely could have been used better in the original floor plan, and it would take more money than we want to put into it to make those changes now. It needs some updating. And yet, everyone - including our realtor, who would have made twice as big of a commission on the sharon house - kept telling us that if we were considering getting a place on Prospect St. we'd be crazy not to grab it, and so we did. I've been tepid on the house from the get go. I figured it would be passable once we did the necessary improvements, but I definitely didn't LOVE it and there were aspects of it I really didn't like. However, despite the fact that I come from a long line of people who are constitutionally incapable of admitting they were wrong under any circumstance, a character trait which I definitely inherited more than a touch of - I hereby announce to the great wide internets, everyone was right. Lakeville IS great in the summer. Today was the opening weekend for the town lake, so I put the kids in the stroller and rolled on down to see what this vaunted grove was all about. It's a great little beach - tons of sand, tons of grassy area, the requisite fries n' soft serve hut, docks for boating and swimming, grills for grilling, etc. There are lifeguards, a little kid section (blocked in by docks, supervised by a lifeguard, with water that only goes up to about Owen's waist) so you really can just let the littles go play. And the best part is that the grove is only open to people who either live here or rent a house for more than a month (and can prove it with a utility bill or a lease), and because the town is so small, it's always people you know and never crowded. Most of Owen's preschool class and their families were there - this is a small town, so that's about 9 kids - and the kids had such a blast that Elias went missing around 5:40 this afternoon, and after a frantic search we found that he had literally fallen asleep in a corner. All the summer people are here this weekend opening up their summer homes, the restaurants all opened up their outdoor seating, and there starts this weekend a series of festivals, fairs, and town/region celebrations that happen every weekend all summer to entertain the weekenders.

I 100% recant on wondering at times if this house was a bad idea. What I didn't realize about living in a town that is primarily a vacation town is that we now have a vacation house. Sure, it's a bit smaller than would be ideal, and needs some updating, but I definitely made a 180 on the whole Lakeville experience today. There are worse things than having a weekend house that you don't even need to pack the car and drive to on the weekend because you're already there.